There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She just used a chaser for red wine.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
