please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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