I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
