I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
