Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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