i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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