going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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