I'm drive I can fine osifer
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
