i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
