It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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