Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
