are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
