he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize
