so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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