Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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