You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
