I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
she looked like the before picture.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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