That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I understand Curling. That high.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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