is wine microwaveable?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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