Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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