uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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