I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
My hand turned me down
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
