The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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