Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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