Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
