how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
