i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
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