oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
