so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
