he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize