C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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