We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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