Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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