if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
