We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
