so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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