Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
