hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
