Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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