you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
