honey bunches of taint.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
