were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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