i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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