Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
