Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
