and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
