i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
