So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
