I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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