dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize